When you read you begin with ABC, when you bake you begin with rolling your sleeves

Back around Christmas, my mom and sister asked me how to make cookies. When I began to give them the recipe, however, I realized that it would take much more than a recipe to explain how to bake. Not only do you need to know some fundamental rules; you need to know when to break them in order to enjoy the activity, which brings me to my first and most important rule:

If you're not having fun, stop. Home baking should never be something to stress over. If you feel yourself losing your nerve, sit down and have a glass of wine before you return to the kitchen. If you're completely defeated, quit! No one is going to judge you more harshly than you do yourself. Once you get back your confidence, you'll not only bake better; you'll be better.

Bring all your ingredients to room temperature. Don't be afraid to leave eggs and dairy out on the counter! Listen, I know salmonella is a thing...but is it, really? Sugar denatures the proteins in eggs, essentially "cooking" the harmful bacteria out of raw dough. When your ingredients are the same temperature, they just work better together. Cold retards the chemical and physical processes necessary for successful baking.

Taste what you make before it goes in the oven. Not only is it delicious, but it gives you a good sense of what the finished product will taste like. When you get better at baking, you will develop the ability to tell how your product will turn out just by looking at it. Proper initial consistency and flavor are the two key elements to proper final texture and taste.

Make a mess. Admittedly, this has been a problem in my professional life. Keeping clean and organized is a sign of respect to your coworkers, yourself, and your food. At home, I just don't give a damn. I'm constantly coming up with ideas as I work and acting on those ideas whether I know they'll turn out or not. As a consequence, my countertops are near constantly covered in a dusting of flour or cocoa, and I have at least three kitchen appliances out at one time. Despite my attempts to change, I always revert to the mess. The mess makes me feel accomplished, happy, and comfortable in my clumsiness. The outside world can be harsh to my kind, but in my kitchen, I am queen.

Scrape dat bowl. Between every stage of mixing, scrape your bowl and paddle down thoroughly with a spatula. This helps incorporate bits of the mixture that may have gone rogue during the first go-round.

Butter and flour your pans. Nothing's worse than a good brownie that won't come out.

Invest in silicone baking mats. You will never have to grease a cookie sheet again.

Wash up. I don't just mean your hands; your pots, pans, measuring cups, mixer, and spatulas, too. I may be messy, but I always clean up afterwards. Butter and dairy pick up even the slightest off flavor left behind from a previous project. Egg whites fail to whip in the presence of fat.

Measure properly and sift! I'm not joking. Baking is not an improvisational endeavor until you're really good at it. Sifting does three things: adds volume to the dry ingredients and thus the baked good, sorts out any bits or clumps, and equally distributes chemical leaveners such as baking soda or powder. Depending on the recipe, I will sift up to four times.

If possible, move your shit to a cooling rack. Cookies, cakes, brownies, and bread continue to cook once they have come out of the oven. Even if your product is done when a knife has come out clean, it may overbake if you leave it in the pan for too long. Once you've ascertained that the product is stable enough to be handled, flip it out.

Finally...

Chill, bitch.