Get brown-wise

Myriad varieties of brownie have been made over the years- boxed, from scratch; nuts, no nuts; iced, cheesecake. I don't get it. Why can't we let brownies be brownies? The brownie is the prototype for all chocolate desserts. It is, simply, chocolate, flour, butter, eggs, and sugar. When we go mucking about with nuts and jams and zest and (ugh!) marshmallows and that awful cream cheese mess we swirl onto the top that says "cheesecake" but doesn't come close to tasting like it, we lose the meaning of the brownie.

About a year ago, I tried Thomas Keller's Ad Hoc brownie recipe for the first time, and I've never gone back. They are the perfect compromise between fudgy and cakey- almost contradictory, like a dense chocolate mousse. They are, in fact...the Henry Clay of brownies.


Thomas Keller's Ad Hoc Brownies


3/4 cup all-purpose flour
1 cup best-quality cocoa powder
1 tsp kosher salt (I love kosher salt and use it in everything)
3 sticks unsalted butter, cut into cubes
3 large eggs, room temperature
1 3/4 cup granulated sugar
1 1/2 tsp pure vanilla extract
1 1/2 cups 60-70% chocolate chips

Pulverized Cappuccino Sugar for dusting

Preheat the oven to 350F. Butter and flour an 8x8in. or 9x9 in. pan.
Sift the flour and cocoa into a bowl, then add the salt. Set aside.
Melt 1 1/ sticks of butter in a small saucepan, remove from heat. Add the rest of the butter and stir with a spoon until the mixture is creamy and has cooled down to room temperature. Don't worry about lumps, as this will contribute moisture to the final product.

As the butter is cooling, pulse the chocolate chips in the food processor in five second increments until the largest piece is no bigger than the size of a pea. Chopping the chocolate will allow it to melt into the batter instead of standing alone as chips. This gives the brownie a smoother mouthfeel.

Mix the eggs and sugar together with the paddle attachment on your mixer at medium speed for 3-5 minutes, until the eggs are pale yellow in color and frothy. Add the vanilla.

Slowly add the dry ingredients in thirds, alternating with the butter until the batter is smooth.
Scrape down the sides of the bowl and blend in the chopped chocolate.
Spread the batter evenly into the pan and bake for 40-50 minutes. The brownies are ready when a knife inserted into the middle comes out mostly clean, save a few straggling crumbs.
Cool the brownies in the pan until they reach room temperature.

Pulverized Cappuccino Sugar


1 cup granulated sugar
3 1/2 Tbsp instant espresso powder
1/4 cup nonfat dry milk

Place ingredients in a blender and grind into a fine powder. It should have sugar "smoke" rising out of it when the sugar is ready.

When the brownies are cool, run a knife around the edges and invert the pan. Cut into 16 squares, and sift the cappuccino sugar onto the tops.

I have one final thing to say, and that is: those all-edges brownie pans can eat a dick. Who are these people that like to eat dry, inedible petrified poop craps? I can't even...